Monday, January 31, 2011

m-county!


The last Friday of the first month of the year, a time when those smiles start forming on our faces. By now bankers have cash in their pockets and the popular question this time round is ‘cheque zimepelekwa bank?’

Start off the weekend by tuning to Joey and Joe on Capital FM. The duo is a thing for a weekend, from the mixing by Joe to the suave presentation by Joey. I pity lads like Stig Masya, who started listening to the show while he was in a mathree and he couldn’t alight. Word is that he made three trips in that jav! As for Mutheu Mutua, buy a radio!

Saturday morning, we panga ourselves. Mulwa, our Thika senator had lost his bro weeks ago and they were laying him to rest. Mutinda and Musau pick me up along the road. Now, ever rode on a ProBox? To this minute, my you-know-what is paining!

Kulabu, my team is traveling to Nakuru. Sad that we lost to such a team (am not undermining them but…) but we take on Machine this weekend. Kulabu, whether we win or lose we together.

Stop by Caltex for some nyama choma. Bump on this mzee with a shiny opara. Mutinda laughs till he fell off the seat. We called it a clear runaway and wonder whether our generation will get there.

Mitaboni welcomes us but we can’t recall the way to the home. We keep asking for the direction and all we get is ‘noo vaa’…meaning we already there. We get the service of a local boda-boda guy. This guy is a devil on his own level.

When we left the ‘town’, he had a rubber strip dangling off his back seat and we followed him behind, waiting to see if it will come in contact with spokes. Upon signaling him, he pulls a stunt of driving the bike with one hand and sorting the rubber thing. I though I only see it in movies!

Laz, Kasomi and Victor are here. Victor’s chick too. (People are becoming serious!).

Once paying our final respects, we hit the route back to Nairobi, but decide to use Machakos. Musau’s buddy has an invitation and we take the Katoloni. It’s a nice local with beer going at 100.00. A crate and a half are ordered. “Mututho ndeeese kuu” (Mututho doesn’t know here) is the spirit. The local is behind a hostel meant for chicks alone and no male guest is allowed unless on certification. For this, I will call that drinking spot ‘Virgin Territory!’

Maurice joins us. The debates that ensued…my ears went deaf. The guy does relationships clinic on the vibeweekly site. If you having issues in your relationship, from wondering whether a 3-some is bad to saving it by knowing the consequences of going to bed in a Safaricom tee shirt that has a nibbled collar. This is the guy!

Bottles later and the entourage heads to Wizards. It’s Machakos-es hotspot (I think). Place is funny. One has to go through a chipped road, then go like two floors up, take a corner and another corner. It has a single giant screen and I wonder how people watch soccer there.

Kriss Kims is in the house. He is Machakos top male model and all aspiring models from these sides must be looking up to him for guidance. Eunice, Jackie and Maggie are also around, coming from I don’t know where. Great company offered by the trio.

Booze is cheap here. Three beers at 380.00!

Then all of a sudden there is no music. Its midnight and they have to close. That’s Machakos for you. Wonder how those peeps survive! Sauli Bahati shows up with his ‘ome-boyz’ and great bonding with them. The guy has a blog, a must read. Has a funny name. click HERE.

Leave Machakos juggling whether to venture into Maanzoni or not. Undecided, we make a turn at Makutano. Sorry Kamanza but Nairobi city was only 20 minutes away!

From this point, I lost clue and all I remember is waking up at Connections, Mlolongo. Musau, I have respected your driving! Word!!!!

Here we sit across these two lovely chicks. I make a move. One of them tells me she works at a reputable media house, and when I drive my nose, she changes, saying she wanted to be a journalist. She’s lucky we were high! End of story!

Imara Daima, that’s the final stop. But as they say, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. The end!

Titbits: been a great week for my pal Ibrahim Ahmed aka Johnny. The politician finally managed to get a ruling on his case against Simon Mbugua, the guy we once said needs diaper-change! Johnny, all the best. If you are a Kamukunji person, VOTE wisely.


my buddy Eric Mugo had a chance to 'hang-out' with Sang of the Hague 6 at Kitwek Nite...note the height variation!

there goes Mitaboni's Makmende! Stunt 101!