Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Shootout's August copy!




Get your copy of the Shootout.co.ke photo-mag!

Digital Camera World is your guide to digital imaging and digital photography. Each issue is full of digital camera reviews, digital imaging tips and tricks, digital photography tutorials, digital imaging software and accessory reviews. We are delighted to share with you this free gift of photography knowledge and insight. Enjoy!

Shootout is a photography exploration initiative by Jude Xavier and Omondi Abudho (and off course with a strong backing of the Lens Men). Their aim is to push the boundaries of contemporary photography in East Africa (soon the whole of Africa). Despite the camera and other tools used, their aim is to showcase the best Africa has to offer in terms of lifestyle, scenery and talent.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Atoti yaawaa!

Si was Soooooooo Biutiful ......Atoti Nyar Yimbo
* Si thought "Generol Muotos" was in the army.
* Si thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
* At the bottom of an applicason where it says "Sign here" si wrote......... "Sagittarius......."

Si was Soooooooo Biutiful ......Atoti Nyar Yimbo
* Si took the ruler to bed to see how long Si slept.
* Si sent a fax with a stamp on it

Si was Soooooooo Biutiful ......Atoti Nyar Yimbo
* Si tripped over a cordless phone.
* Si spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice can because it said "Concentrate......."
* Si told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK."

Si was Soooooooo Biutiful .......Atoti Nyar Yimbo
* Si studied for a blood test.
* When Si missed matatu number 44 to Githurai .....Si took matatu number 22 twice instead.
* When Si went to the Jomo Kenyatta Airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport Left," Si turned around and went home.

Si was Soooooooo Biutiful .......Atoti Nyar Yimbo
* When Si heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, Si moved......
* Si thought if Si spoke her mind, Si'd be speechless.......
* Si thought that Si could not use her AM radio in the evening.
* Si had a shirt that said "TGIF," which Si thought stood for "This Goes In Front."

Si was Soooooooo Biutiful ......Atoti Nyar Yimbo
* Need I say more ...eh yawah....

Courtesy

Sunday, July 11, 2010

the fight for Mijingo rages on…Kenya 15's Vs Uganda 15's

...that piece of rock…yes, that one that made one president M7 come all the way to Kenya to address members of the press was once again on my agenda. Sorry but this may not be your main news to you but the Kenyan 15's team facing the Ugandan side…well, such a clash (to the weird me) would slot in as fight for Mijingo.

Away from all the world cup fever that has swept the universe! why would 25 grown men chase a small round thing when Paul the Octopus can predict the winner? Let's watch rugby!

Saturday midday finds me sited at the KRFU grounds, the place is almost empty compared to what you see at the Sevens and can't blame it on 'Seven Virgins' aka first timers and wannabes in the world of rugby. This are people who only show up at popular tourneys and have soiled the art of cheering rugby by showing up with vuvuzelas, getting drunk on one 500ml Tusker and misbehaving, then proceed to upload photos on their facebook just to prove a point. "Nilikuwa sevens…siwezi hata seven!" Next Sevens show up in a vuvuzela and you toshea in it!


Mangu and St. Mary's are pulling each other's shorts to try see who will peleka nyumbani the Prescott cup. Such titles came to my understanding immediately I cleared high school in Ukambani (although me once attended Blackrock at St. Mary's while at Mbooni Boys…with our face-me ride and funny-colored jerseys…story for another day!). The zeal I noticed in this high school kids was one of it's own! The saddest bit is that they also tried outdoing each other in cheering…such things should be left to one legendary school called Machakos school aka MacB, who were ranked as the best cheering squad years back. is kuwasifu but, creativity was their second name..blame it on McKenzie and other heads!

Mangu manage to outdo St. Mary's for the cup. Wazimba they call themselves!



Kenya vs Uganda (women)
Days back, i swore to attend a match and try feel and see and hear how ladies feel when the likes on Injera and Khayange sprint amidst the flashing of their digital cameras. The Ugandan and Kenyan mama's take on each other and one would expect scratching, biting, shoving, b-slaps and all defensive and offensive tactics used by our sisters. It is a clean game save for some neck tackling. There was however a light moment with one 'gigantic' (my apologies to all my sisters out there) mama from Uganda…from afar, one would have thought she is a dude, thanks to her height, weight and facial expression!

The Kenyan mamas covet the trophy, of course wake home-ground!


Kenya vs Uganda (men)
Coached by one 'tank', the 15's take on the Ugandans, and a week ago, they were in the same position. History repeats itself and Kenya carries the day! However, I really pity one guy that was next to our stand, for he had to take the heat from the fans. From songs to words. Oddly enough is that at the end of the match, he lauded the fans. Spirit of game, I like!



Ministry of Rugby
Ever heard of die-hard rugby fans? People who jaza two busses and head all the way to Uganda, not only once just to show solidarity with their compatriots? Meet the Fanatics, led by one Arigi and TOnyango! These gang has decided to take the art of rugby cheering to the next level, by coming up with a site where they interact and discuss rugby issues. They also have affordable merchandise up for sale.

Arigi, am told has a 'sad' history with rugby. He used to play for Maseno back in high school…but what made him start cheering remains a mystery. More of like Moses and the burning bush! Arigi is a household name in the field of rugby both local and Internationally, with foreign referees acknowledging his ability to distract them from the match, thanks to his words!

This one from Arigi killed me:: "Hata Paul the Octopus ikawekewa chakula kwa box ya Uganda, itarudi too ill kwa box ya Kenya!"

TOnyango is gifted in coining words instantly. Whatever comes into his mind is what comes out of his mouth. Thank God we all get to understand him, a first timer will for sure block his/her ears. See no evil, Hear no evil but Talk evil must be TOnyango's motto.

Kat, Puree, Faith, Millie and many others are also in the 'house'…all dressed in the Fanatics tee-shirt! Things we do for rugby!

then..there was this dreadlocked guy dressed in high school uniform that made my day, Whatever you smoke, please stop. Check out the photos…some things are better explained graphically!


bitz!!
Friday, i managed to find time and Giggle with some goons. Oliver Mathenge, congratulations for making it home by 3.00am on a Saturday morning..and please don't revenge!

James Murua, nice linking with you again bro, but next time avoid carrying magazines and books that make you look like an insurance broker! and thanks for admitting you take 3 years to read through a 90 page biography with big fonts!

We thank EABL for the 500ml can…but not all Kenyans consume Tusker! iko na watu we Pilsner, iko watu we Smirnoff Ice…ikona watu ya malt…iko watu ya chang'aa (oops!) do something EABL guys!


and by the way, what were the scores of the matches?

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Ghana, nice play boys!

The whole continent was watching, a penalty at the very last minute! That just doesn’t ball your way, notably at a world cup! Minutes later, the dream was gone! The Black Stars had crashed out of the South Africa showpiece on penalties after Gyan spurned a gilt-edged chance to seal a semi-final berth deep in extra-time, but smashed his penalty off the bar.

This disheartened many fans, with some venting on him via their status updates on Facebook and Twitter and blogs.

For anyone whose ever played football you will know the pressure that comes with that one penalty kick. Ask the likes of Roberto Baggio in Italia 90, John Terry at the 2008 Champions League Final ............. (Add more names)

From my own point of view, people need give the Black Stars a break, and cut their slack about criticizing them. They played better than some teams like France, England and Italy, which were bundled out and sent home! How about Brazil, they didn’t last the 90 minutes. A total humiliation.

Ghana is a young team, disciplined and focus. Contrary to what Shakira sang, maybe…maybe this wasn’t our time. There is still another second time.

In other news, Asamoah Gyan has vowed to bounce back from his heart-breaking World Cup 2010 quarter-final penalty miss, which saw the last African nation eliminated from the tournament by Uruguay.


Ujinga..
And high time Kenyans stopped taking their lives for the sake of football..or taking the other one’s life! Huko mbele hautapatana na mpira! NKT

The two young men brawled moments after African team Ghana lost its quarter final match against Uruguay in penalties. One of the men was stabbed by his colleague before a crowd intervened and stoned the culprit to death in the densely populated Githurai Kimbo Estate.

Trouble started when a group of youths differed on predictions of results after Ghana's opener.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Tusker vs Poetry!

Gone are the days when Syombua, the local hood waitress would open my Tusker bottle and leave, fumbling with the bottletop! There is a massive hunt of those 'peels' for the numbers that lie beneath them, can earn you several more crates of beer! This is due to the ongoing Tusker 50 milli ya mafans promotion has seen over 30 million Kenya shillings of prizes having been claimed and about 20 million shillings still to be won.

So, last Wednesday i get an invite to attend one their many awarding ceremony (am a fan of Tusker, only that just the other day I started consuming the malt one…you know yourself if you stole me from my favorite brand…power of women i tell you!)

I look for one James Murua, but he is for the idea that his liver needs some attention. Trust the world toss start falling apart when James starts talking of sobriety!

Laura Kaindi joins me minutes later, this lovely damsel comes from the dusty town of Athi River…yep, where we got lost for three hours! I almost ask her how they survive with all that dust…ma they have those dust masks? reminds me of that sect that had predicted dooms-day and dug for themselves mihandaki only for nothing to happen. i hold back my question…will still get you sweetie!

I get to meet one Samson Mulwa, who comes from Eastleigh and is one of the winners. He confides to me that the money came in at an opportune time as he runs a tyre business and the money will boost him! he is the age of my daddy, me listens!
Tusker Brand manager Wanyi Mwaura informs me that there are instant giveaways which include a free tusker, 200 shillings or 10,000 Kenya shillings…that makes me order like 4 more bottles!



one thing about Tusker is that it is an iconic African Brand and undisputed leader in the alcoholic beverage industry, representing authentic African success that has won international acclaim.

Grace Kerongo strides in…for the upteenth time, my name is Stephen, not Steven! We catch up with her and the sad bit is all our meetings either end up with me linking up with one James Murua (wachia hapo)…or realizing that I need be home at 4.30am…she has a way of psyching me up to meet that 'fuda'!

John Muchiri, welcome to the world of blogging! blog your mind out!


WAMATHAI the poet
Wamathai is at Secret's Lounge…doing what he does best. Overheard that the place was jam-packed and the security is freezing people out! kwani daddy you was dishing out candies to poet lovers? I call up one Kamjo (hook up with Kamjo for free mixtures http://www.facebook.com/pages/Deejay-Kamjo/128354303869660?ref=ts&v=wall) and he assures me that he has even placed a Kg of meat for me…daddy, mimi sikuragi tubukiza!

We finally stagger to Secrets on to find the event over. "Go to his site and download the poems," is the solace i get from Anyiko Owoko. Which reminds me, unarefuka ukienda wapi? No standing next to you sweeties, you assame me!

Here i get to meet a whole gang of twitterers (let me call it my Facebook clande..LOL), Amasy, Muendo, Oliver, Wamathai and many others. mad love for you people. What happened to mauwano by the way? Ama you uwanaad and cant hold anymore? Chiira? anyone?




Ghana face Uruguay, let me save my ink to go watch!

Its Friday, drink and SMS that magic number under the crown, might be your day/night!

Below is my favorite piece of writin from Wamathai, the goon!

I had always wanted to hook up with a white woman because i had heard something about them that made me extremely curious. They are very adventurous in bed apparently and so when an opportunity presented itself i took it with both hands. Her name was Leslie and she didn’t disappoint. Everyday with her was a learning experience. We did things in bed that i never dreamed i would do. I didn’t have to suggest anything she seemed to know what I wanted.
It wasn’t all rosy though since some kinky things we did backfired on us. The visitor at the door one time she had handcuffed me to the bed with whipped cream all over turned out to be the best friend and her family. As they were talking, the kids wandered to the bedroom. They screamed when they saw me which brought the grown ups. To say that I was embarrassed is an understatement.

Another time she suggested that I wear her panties to my family get together. It was a turn on for her and she promised to reward me later. I refused at first but she eventually convinced me. I felt safe since only the two of us knew about it. The party was outside and it was a full house. The sun was out, it promised to be a lovely day. I went to help with the nyama choma but the heat got the better of me and I passed out. My uncle, a doctor, checked my vitals and performed first aid. When he loosened my belt and undid the top button of my trouser as is required, my girlfriend’s red panties were clearly visible to all the worried faces around me. I did ultimately wake up and I was alright but I have never fully recovered from that moment of shame. We are still together though.

© wamathai warugongo

http://wamathai.com/2010/04/white-woman/